Letters: On Relationships - Is she the one?

hello there.

how goes it? I have to say congratulations on having another baby! So hows that all going? Sounds cool!

Got plenty of assignments to do, which is loadsa fun. Things with xxxx have been going well. But I still have doubts. Sometimes I think I will get married to her, and then there are times where I’m like I dunno about anything, and I’m just a bit confused and have doubts. The thing is she really loves me, and she knows that I have doubts at times.

I wish that I could be sure of us. I’m worried that in a years time or longer I’ll realise that we shouldn’t go out, and I’ll look back and realise I shouldn’t have held it on for so long, because I don’t want to hurt anymore than possible. Am I being selfish holding it on and hoping that I’ll become certain or what?

Why couldn't life be easier!?

Trying to start a case for Christ - so far so good!

XXXX

Hi XXXX

Good to hear from you again. Having a new baby in the house is great. And Eva really loves her.

About you and xxxx – doubts are part of the process, at least they were for me. I had periodic doubts about marrying Judith until near the wedding! That might sound odd, but it makes sense in a way. If two Christians are right for each other and will be good for each other, the devil will try and get in whatever way he can to disrupt their relationship - it might be through physical temptation, or through giving you doubts. What I kept coming back to in my own mind was that I had prayed for Judith to love me, and now she did, and if God had answered that prayer then I wasn’t going to let the devil get in the road!

The other part of the problem is that we allow feelings to guide us too much. Love isnt so much a feeling as something we do. Yes, feelings are involved, but if we depend on them and we go through a rough patch we'll end up getting divorced! And if the rough patch hadnt happened then the divorce wouldnt have happened!

Don’t focus on your feelings, focus on who she is, and what qualities (godly and others) you like about her.

Another thing I've often thought about is this - and its easy for me to say now that I'm married - I'm not convinced that God means us to give all this anxiety about who we're going to marry.

I think we spend too much time worrying about, "Is she the one?", as if God has promised to reveal specifically the girl we should marry. I think God is more interested in what teh relationship will be like, rather than who it is with (provided we obey his commands to marry only in the Lord, and to be wise).

My reasoning is simple - For the most of the history of mankind you didnt have a choice. Your parents chose a wife for you and you had to settle down to the serious business of being a loving husband, whether you felt like it or not!

Its only in the last 100 years that this has changed and only really in the western world. So that suggests to me that that perhaps we should be less focused on who we are marrying (as long as they are a christian, and a wise choice within biblical guidelines), and more focused on what sort of man we will be in the relationship.

And be thankful that at this point in history we have the added bonus of being able to pick someone we like!

So course there is a balance to be kept, but I think at the minute we get too hung up on "Is she the one?" and focus too little on "Am I who I should be?".

So dont let feelings be your guide - focus on the facts - will she be good for you as a Christian? Will she help you grow? Will you be able to help her grow? Are you and her compatible - I mean, "Do you see eye to eye on important issues? or will they become a source of conflict in a marriage." Do you like her? Can you see yourself being married to her?

And then concentrate your efforts on being a godly Christian man towards her, helping her grow, allowing her to help you grow, and the wonderful thing is that in the process of doing this you will find real deep love for her growing.

Give the relationship all you have at this stage, within the limits we talked about in the last email - ie not spending all your time together etc. Pray that if it isnt right that God would make it plain, and then get on with giving the relationship everything, and if God doesnt want it to happen he'll make it plain.

I hope that makes sense.

God bless

Mark

Letters: On Relationships - Not getting too physical

Hi XXXX

Glad things are turning the corner with the doubts. Now on to the big one – relationships!

Things with xxxx and i are not that great. At the start we didnt really prepare ourselves for a relationship, and sometimes went a bit 'far'. We strived to not do it, and focus more on Christ, by Bible studys etc. But at times we fall again.

Yeah, I remember that feeling. I think for me one of the key things was realising that we can substitute the physical side of things (especially prolonged kissing), for almost any other aspect of the relationship - conversation, doing things together. In a sense the physical side of things is a cop out. It's quick and easy satisfaction. And if it is taking more time than anything else, or is going too far, we need to be fairly ruthless, and cut back a lot.

I have no hard and fast rules here, because people are different. But it might be a good idea to say, "We'll limit physical contact to holding hands and a brief peck on the cheek" and both of you stick to that, holding the other accountable.

In my experience its nearly always the guy who wants more physical contact, and its nearly always the guy who expects the girl to draw the limits - so he takes and takes until he then realises that its going too 'far'.

As the bloke you need to draw the lines and stick to them, and not wait for her to tell you to stop. And yet she needs to help you and hold you accountable.

Also, most girls are more happy with a show of affection, and some attention to who they are and what they're doing in life, than with a long passionate snog.

Most recently being yesterday. We're talking about it tomorrow. I said that if it was her best Christian friend and she was doing what we did would she want that relationship to continue. She’s coming round tomorrow to talk. I feel that maybe if we wanted to grow closer to Christ it could be better apart - even though i think that she would make an amazing Christian wife. I’m pretty unsure what to do.

I think the key question you need to ask yourself is, "Am I going out with this girl because I want to be in a relationship, or because I really want to marry her? Do I want to serve her sacrificially in a Christ-like manner (Eph 5:25) for the rest of my life?"

I tend to think you should only enter a relationship if you are aiming for marriage, in other words if you can specifically see yourself marrying, and want to be married to, this person.

If you're only going out with her because you want to be in a relationship, then that's not fair to her. If you think that she'd make 'someone' a great Christian wife, but aren’t necessarily convinced that you must be that 'someone', then I would feel that it might be better to stop.

On the other hand, if you really can see yourself marrying her, and feel that she would be good for you as a Christian (Does she spur you on in the Christian life?), then I wouldn’t see the need to break things up now.

It might be the case that you need to sit down together and set down some basic guidelines. Both of you are at uni - so your priority over the next number of years is your studies, not each other. Therefore you need to limit the time you spend together - say, twice (or three times) a week. Perhaps you need to say that only one of those occasions will be alone, the others will be when lots of other people will be around -- say meeting up for lunch. This will provide a safe-guard, to some degree.

The thing about the physical aspect of a relationship is that it is like lighting a fuse that only burns for so long before it explodes. And while marriage is a long way off, for example when people are at university, the longer you can keep from lighting that fuse the better. By our very nature, our bodies know that sex is the final destination, and we quickly get dissatisfied with each level below that, and want more. So there is little point in starting the process when the goal isnt attainable, ie when marriage is a long way off.

(Also the more you lay off the physical the more you can develop the relationship.)

Another guideline might be that you lay off the physical side of the relationship and concentrate on building up the conversational, the spiritual, the enjoyment side of things. For example:

• read the same books (not necessarily Christian ones) and talk about them.
• Buy a kite and go and fly it together.
• Find an interest and work at it together - photography, putting together an album of the trip to the Antarctic etc.
• Or start up a blog at Blogger.com and both write about what you have learned from a passage of scripture. It doesn’t need to be for others to read, just for each other. The idea is to spend time working together because that is what a marriage is, working together.
• Or if you are doing a bible study dont feel you have to use a study book, try taking a book of the bible and agreeing to read a chapter a day, and then meet up once a week to talk about what you've both learned. Judith and I used to do that. Its much less formal and preparation can easily be incorporated into your own devotional time.
  

Why don’t you map out the areas you want to grow in as a Christian, and get her to do the same, and talk about them, and talk about how you can help each other, and how best achiving your goals can be realised.

Sorry for such a long email. Give us a shout and let me know if any of this makes sense!

In Christ,

Mark

Letters - Doubt

Here's a new feature - Occasionally I get emails asking for advice, and often the same topics are covered. So I'm going to print a series of letters I've written to a young person over the last while. Names will be removed to protect the poor soul who has had to put up with my advice, and I suspect that I will amalgamate several correspondents into one.

Hopefully it will be of some use. Now stop trying to guess who wrote them…


Hi XXXXX

Good to hear from you, I was wondering whether my email had got through or not.

Thanks for feeling you could email me. Feel free to use me as a sounding board or to pick my brains, whatever use they might be. I'll intersperse my comments with yours:

Sometimes i fell myself doubting and questioning it even though i think it to be true, i just find it unbelievably difficult to whole heartedly believe, sometimes i feel like thomas.

I wrestle with doubts too at times. When I start to have doubts I usually think back to the concrete events that cannot be denied - Jesus was born, he claimed to be God, he was crucified, and the evidence for the resurrection is pretty astonishing. And if all that is the case, then Jesus is who he said he was, and if he is who he said he was, then what he says about God and about scripture must be true.

So for me one of the key issues is to settle in my mind firmly the issues of his existence (the historical proof), his crucifixion, and his resurrection. Probably the best book around is 'The Case for Christ' by Lee Strobel.

I just feel that i dont have any sort of relationship with Christ, i feel I barely know Him.

At times I feel like that myself. Sometimes its a good thing because it means that we have a hunger to know him more. But we can never let it rest there. If we are hungry we need to feed ourselves!

I would suggest taking time to read books about Jesus - something really good, like ‘The Cross he Bore’, or ‘Is it nothing to you?’ both by Prof Frederick Leahy, or ‘Seeing and Savouring Christ’ by John Piper. Any of those will, if read slowly and prayerfully will give you a greater appreciation of what Jesus has done for you. And as your understanding grows, your heart will be warmed.

You could also try the three sermons on Christ's tears that are linked in the side column of my blog. I would suggest printing them out and perhaps using them in your devotions over the space of a week or two. Often we rush things rather than spending more time.

Hope that helps to point you in the right direction

Mark

Heaven

Sorry for the long absence - summer has been hectic, but here’s something to cheer you up.

The church camp where I am the leader is for 13-15 year old boys. On one of the evenings we looked at different questions that they might either have or be asked, with the purpose of showing them how to be ready to give an answer. The layout of the evening is quite a useful one, so I’ll set it out here in case any of you want to use it. The boys are divided up into groups of 5 or so, and a leader briefs them for about 3 minutes on how to answer a particular question. They then rotate around to another leader who plays devil’s advocate on that question for about 5 mins, and then debriefs for a couple of minutes, before he then briefs them on how to answer another question, and then they rotate again.

Anyhow… the question I was briefing them on was, “What’s wrong with looking at pictures of naked women?”.

And me being me I wanted to get them to think of Christianity and God as being more than a set of negatives. So started off by telling them this:

“God is not a spoilsport. He has designed a time and a place when you can look at a naked woman when you want, and as much as you want (within reason).”

Obviously that got their attention. Then I asked, “What’s it called?”

At this point all of the groups caught on and answered, “Marriage”.

Except for one small boy who, with a wistful look in his eye, sighed and said, “Heaven”.

Another Voice - Parenting 3

Samuel Taylor Coleridge once fell into conversation with a gentleman who believed that children should receive no formal religious instruction: they should, rather, be free to choose their own religious faith upon reaching a suitable age.

Coleridge did not disagree, but later invited the man into his rather unkempt garden. "You call this a garden?" the visitor exclaimed. "There are nothing but weeds here!"

"Well, you see," Coleridge replied, "I did not wish to infringe upon the liberty of the garden in any way. I was just giving the garden a chance to express itself and to choose its own way."

No matter what well meaning sociologists claim, a child is not born morally and religiously neutral, as if all they need is to be left to its own devices to grow up untainted and noble and wise. If you just let a child go with its natural tendencies they will become destructive and self-destructive. All you have to do is to see a tantrum thrown by a 3-month-old child – they’re mad enough to kill you, but they only weigh 10 pounds and not 210!

The Bible teaches that children are born with an inherent inclination towards doing wrong. And so that’s why Paul writes in Ephesians 6:4 “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.’

It is not enough to “not exasperate” them, we are to have a positive input into their spiritual and moral upbringing. We are to “bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord”.

What does that mean? It means that, since we have brought people into the world who have an eternal soul that will go to either Heaven or Hell, God holds parents responsible for teaching their kids about him, and about what he requires, and about what Jesus has done for us. It means letting them see that wrong is wrong and will be punished. It means letting them see that God is not just Holy, but loving and has provided Jesus to pay the price for our sin.

This is part of what the “training and instruction of the Lord means”.

Practically it means that we should be reading the Bible to our children, teaching them to pray, taking them to a church where God’s word is taught and explained. But of course we’ll not want to do that unless we have a right relationship with God ourselves. For even if we do it, we’d be hypocrites telling our children to be interested in something we weren’t interested in – and that would exasperate them, which we are commanded not to do.

The answer is found not in simply following God’s instructions for parenting, but in following the God who gives them. God has commissioned parents with a challenging but eternally significant role. How will you respond?

Another Voice - Parenting 2

(Column from Letterkenny Post)

Parenting – part 2
‘Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.’ – Ephesians 6:4.

Exasperate means to frustrate or annoy greatly. And although he directs his command to fathers, mothers are included – because it’s not alright for them to exasperate their kids! What do we as parents do that exasperates our kids? Let me suggest 6 areas:

Hypocrisy – “Don’t ****** use that sort of language with me,” I once heard a mum say to her daughter! That’s hypocrisy. When we tolerate and justify faults in ourselves, but not in our kids, that exasperates them. Often when we see our own faults in our kids we can be more severe on them because we hate the reminder that that is what we are like.

Inconsistency – One day we correct them for doing something, later we ignore them doing the same thing. One day something is ok, the next day the same thing is a major crime. Or maybe we don’t like to set too many boundaries. That’s harmful; children need to know where the limits are. Otherwise we are messing with their sense of right and wrong, and frustrating the life out of them in the process.

Too high expectations – Do we expect a 5 year old to behave as a 10 year old? Or a 13 year old to think/behave like a man? Are we seeking to live our dreams through them? Maybe she doesn’t want to do the gymnastics that we always wished we had done.

Same expectations – Each child is an individual, with different tastes and interests. To treat them as if they were identical can lead to frustration on their part. Do we take time to get to know our kids and what makes them tick?

No encouragement – Are we always faultfinding, but never seeking things to praise? Or perhaps we aren’t faultfinding, but we aren’t encouraging either. If a child puts effort into some idea and comes looking for our praise and gets none, they go away crushed and disheartened.

Neglect – Not just the ‘no food, no care’ type of neglect, but the neglect that goes on in well-to-do homes where mummy and daddy are so busy working, or relaxing that young children become frustrated because they don’t get to see mum and dad as much as they would like to.

God commands us as parents not to exasperate our kids. What should we do if we have been guilty of this? Thankfully we can come to God and seek forgiveness for it, and ask him to help us as we try to bring our children up and show them how to live.

Another Voice - Parenting 1

I'm back from holidays - sorry for the long delay. Over the next few days I'll be posting several of the columns I had written for the local newspaper while I was away.

Parenting – part 1
On Sunday mornings we’ve been looking at a book of the Bible called Ephesians. Last week we looked at a couple of verses that were directed at parents and children. So I thought I’d take the few weeks to share with you some of the things we found.

Paul writes,

‘Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.’ – Ephesians 6:4.

The verse specifically singles out fathers because he expects them to take the lead in the home, and not abdicate responsibility as they often do. Yet Paul’s instructions include mothers too.

Why is parenting important in God’s sight? It is important because parents have a massive responsibility – not just the physical care of their children, but because they are setting the spiritual compass of their children’s lives. Your beliefs and values will be the first that they adopt as their own. What a sobering thought it is to think of our children standing on the Day of Judgment and saying, “Dad, Mum, why didn’t you tell me any of this stuff?”

Why does God care what sort of fathers we are? Because dads in particular have an extremely high calling – we are called to be a picture of what God is like. When I read in the Bible that God is like a fathermy mind fills with images of a loving, protecting, disciplining, passionate father like my own. Unfortunately I know that there are those who have a very different image of a father – absent or abusive, unloving or angry, inconsistent or volatile. How will God the Father treat those who have blackened his portrait to their children? Your children’s idea of God as father is shaped hugely by their own father. How much do you fathers try to reflect godly qualities to your children? Did you realise that this was your job?

So fathers, you and I are to take our lead, not from society, nor even our own fathers, but we are to care for our families as God cares for his. To do so we need to know personally how he deals with his children – that can only come about when we ask him to bring us into his family through Jesus. Then not only will we experience the perfect father’s love and care first hand, but we will find him giving us the strength to demonstrate his fatherliness to our own children.

Another Voice - Addicted to Noise

I read Mark Driscoll's article here - and thought "That's me". I've used it as the basis for this article for the local newspaper.

Addicted to noise?
It was a very normal day until I realized that I was actively destroying my own soul.

The day began with my alarm jolting me from sleep. I went down the stairs and as I went into the study I switched on the computer to hear it ping with e-mail that had been left while I slept. Then I stepped into the shower where I listened to my waterproof radio.

Throughout the day the computer frequently pinged at me to tell me that email had arrived, or that someone I knew had logged on to Microsoft Messenger. As I tried to work the phone rang almost constantly. Lunchtime came and I headed out on the bike, putting on my iPod to listen to some music.

Back for lunch I turned on the TV to catch the headlines and then headed out in the car to do some visits. I flicked on the radio to give me something to listen to as I drove. While I was out, the mobile rang and beeped at me to tell me of missed calls and incoming text messages. After coming back in from a meeting that evening I flicked channels on the TV for a half an hour to find something worth watching before going to bed.

As I drifted off to sleep, it dawned on me that I had hardly a minute of silence during my entire day. I suspect I’m not the alone in this. Many go out walking or jogging with earphones in; everywhere you go there’s a radio on – or music is being piped in from somewhere. Even in our relationships with friends we find the need to talk rather than just enjoy the silence.

We have become addicted to the unholy trinity of Hurry, Worry and Noisy.

Are we afraid of silence? What would happen if we had a moment or two of silence? It might be that we would actually start to think of the important and not just the urgent. Noise keeps us focused on the present – calls to answer, events that are happening. It keeps us focused largely on the trivial – how often is there something of life-changing importance discussed on the radio? Fairly infrequently.

It is in the silences of life that our mind is freed from the tyranny of the present and set free to plan for the future. But it isn’t silence in itself that is important – it is what we do with the silence. In Psalm 46:10 God says, “Be still, and know that I am God.”

This is why we need silence, and pause in life – to hear what God is saying to us. It’s possible that God has been trying to say some very important things to you, things that would bring sense to your swirling world – but you can’t hear Him because of all the noise, and hurry and worry.

God says, “Be still, and know that I am God.”

Outreach Conference 2006

Trial forms for the conference - posted for committee and others to look at.

Sweens and Mark on way to Cinema

T-Shirt for Da Vinci tract distribution

As worn at Letterkenny Cinema by Simon and Mark

Church Weed Watch

Gardeners' Corner
Weed Watch

Some of our gardens are in better shapes than others, but we always need to be on the lookout for weeds. The following are among the hardiest in the church garden, but need to be dealt with if any real growth is to be noticed.

Nonus Bendus - A particularly difficult weed to shift. Has been around for a long time and has never budged before, so why start now. Very attached to its roots.

Notmyjobis - While many other plants take their part in breaking up the ground, fertilising the soil, pollinating and flowering, etc., this weed takes no active role in the flowerbed. Best recognised by its total dormancy.

Mono Mano Bandis - A close relation to the previous culprit, this weed is often surrounded by a number of others of similar ilk. It leaves all the work of the garden up to the gardener; after all "that's what he's paid for".

Infearandtremblingus - Masquerades as a flower, but is actually a weed. This plant is paralysed by a sense of weakness. It is easily discouraged by the hardness of the soil and the hazardous climate. Sounds like a plant that needs special care, but, however, this weakness is only a 'red herring'; the plant is known for drooping in even the best of climates. It will hold back any growth or expansion in the flowerbed.

Me inmy smallcornerus - Experts have concluded that this is not one plant but a tightly knit cluster of plants which huddle together and can fill a flowerbed. Sounds good, but this group produces nothing good, and will reject any attempt to bring in new life. Happy with things the way they are, they have no desire to see new plants.

Dividusandconquerus - Looking much like a flower to begin with, this is actually a hostile weed. It moves into a flowerbed and very quickly entrenches itself between other plants, causing great damage. Other plants fail to flower because all their energy is sapped combating this weed. Consequently the plot becomes very dishevelled in appearance. Characterised by an utter lack of regard for other plants.

Sacrificeisntmykettleoffishus - Other plants will gladly give up some of their space, or do without for the good of the flowerbed. Many other plants recognise the principle of growth through sacrifice. Not this weed; it is unwilling to give up anything for others or for itself.

Neitherhotnorcoldus - Is it a flower or a weed? We're not quite sure. It certainly doesn't bloom like a flower, or show any interest in the beauty or growth of the flowerbed.

Nowyouseemenowyoudontus - Can use up valuable resources in a flowerbed if you have a number of these. Very difficult to deal with. Often deep rooted, but rarely seen, except when they need attention.

Book Review - God, Satan and the Jews

God, Satan and the Jews
Frederick S. Leahy
Cameron Press

With a title like this one you might wonder what sort of a book this is. Perhaps it’s one of those wildly speculative books that links together the Jews with some bizarre end times prophecies. Not from the late Professor Leahy it isn’t. He was a man renowned for basing his thinking securely on what God had revealed, rather than on what we might speculate.

Instead this book is a safe introduction to, as the subtitle puts it, “The place of the Jews in Prophecy and History.” Perhaps you aren’t really sure what the Bible teaches about the Jews now that Jesus has come. Perhaps you’re wondering “What place is there for them in God’s plan?”.

If you’re not sure how to answer – then this is the place to start. In typical concise fashion Prof Leahy lays out the basic teaching of scripture on the place of the Jews. It is a brief book, but it will answer many questions. Not only does he model careful biblical thought, but also he displays a tenderness and love for the Jewish people that we should learn from.

Milford Reformed Presbyterian Church

Here's a map and directions for anyone looking to come to our church in Milford.

Coming from Lettereknny via Ramelton you will be coming in at the bottom right corner of the map.

The Church is the first one you come to as you head out the Kilmacrenan Road.

Service on Sunday morning is at 12 noon.

Map drawn by John Callanan

New Life Fellowship, Letterkenny

Here's directions to where we met in Letterkenny should anyone want to come along some Sunday morning. It would be great to see you.

If you're passing through on holidays or whatever you'd also be welcome to drop by.

• Coming into Letterkenny from the Dry Arch roundabout go straight on at the next two roundabouts.
• This will take you up to a set of traffic lights at Main street. Going straight over and down Main street, you pass the square on the right (small area with a bandstand).
• Take the first road on the left after the square (just before the library).
• Take the second road off it to the left and the Day Centre is the single storey building at the end.

Trueman on Psalms

I'm reading Wages of Spin by Carl Trueman at the moment. It has a chapter entitled, "What can Miserable Christians sing?" which points to the fact that the book of Psalms with its supremely honest wrestling with emotions provides a praise book for all Christians, no matter whether you are lonely, angry or downright miserable.

As well as that, he touches on the same issue in the next article, The Marcions have landed. Here's a great quote which made me laugh. I like this guy - he doesn't just make his point, he makes it in style:

Then, in our church practice, we need to take the Old Testament more seriously. It astounds me, given the overwhelming use of psalms as central to gathered worship in the first four centuries, the absolute importance given to psalmody for the first two centuries of the post-Reformation Reformed churches, and the fact that the Book of Psalms is the only hymn book which can claim to be universal in its acceptance by the whole of Christendom and utterly inspired in all of its statements - it astounds me, I say, that so few psalms are sung in our worship services today.

Moreover, often nothing seems to earn the scorn and derision of others more than the suggestion that more psalms should be sung in worship. Indeed, the last few years have seen a number of writers strike out against exclusive psalmody. Given that life is too short to engage in pointless polemics, I am left wondering which parallel universe these guys come from, where the most pressing and dangerous worship issue is clearly that people sing too much of the Bible in their services. How terrifying a prospect that would be! Imagine: people actually singing songs that express the full range of human emotion in their worship using words of which God has explicitly said, 'These are mine!' Back here on Planet Earth, however, there is generally precious little chance of overloading on sound theology in song in most evangelical churches as the Marcion invasion is pretty much total and unopposed in the sphere of worship. Yet I for one prefer Athanasius to Marcion as a patristic thinker and, in his letter to Marcellinus, he gives one of the most beautiful and moving arguments for psalms in worship ever penned. It is a pity more have not taken his words to heart.

Another Voice - Easter Rising

(Column for Letterkenny Post)

“Today, Ireland begins a week of remembrance, reconciliation and renewal.” So spoke the Taoiseach Bertie Ahern at the opening of the exhibition at the National Museum commemorating the 1916 Rising.

This key event in Irish history has set the tone for many of the events of the past 90 years. The Proclamation of Independence sets out the goals of the Easter Rising, as freedom, fairness and equality in a new community.

Yet Irish historian, Diarmaid Ferriter, writing in last Monday’s Irish Times comments that, although we have freedom, the aspirations of fairness, equality and a new tolerant community have yet to be realised.

It strikes me that, at the deepest level, these aims can’t really be met by remembering the Easter Rising of 1916. You have to look much further back to the original Easter Rising of 30 AD. What Jesus set out to do at the Cross was to create a new community of people no longer at odds with God and with each other, but reconciled and made new – to use the Taoiseach’s words.

Jesus didn’t just come to live as an example, nor did he come simply to pay the price for the sins of those who would trust him. He came to make new the hearts, minds and attitudes of people, to change us from the inside out. That’s what we need before there can be any real and lasting change in society. We need to be made new inside – the old selfish ways, the anger, the indifference etc. removed, and new qualities of love for God along with love for our neighbour created.

That’s what Jesus came to do – to create a new community of people where there is equality, love, compassion, and acceptance. His resurrection guarantees the truth of what he came to do. He was more than a martyr, he actually has the power to change lives.

While the goals of the 1916 Rising are noble, even if we were to achieve them, what use are they if we enjoy them for only the few short years we live on this earth, and then lose out for eternity. On the other hand, if we remember the rising of the 1st century, and find peace from God and are made new by him, we will be ready to face eternity, and we will also achieve here what the seven signatories of the Proclamation set out to achieve, a new community of fairness, equality and tolerance.

Food for thought - A Famine of Hope

(Column for Milford newspaper)

We live in a world where there is a famine of hope. People despair, and struggle with depression. People drop out, walk out, or fall out often because they have lost any sense of hope. They can see no way out. Sometimes in my line of work I meet with people who are struggling with this loss of hope and are wondering, “What’s the point of life? What’s the point of working hard and saving up, and having a pension, if you’re going to die anyway?”

And well-meaning family and friends will say things like, “Cheer up, things aren’t that bad” or “Work hard and settle down, that’ll lift your mind off things”, or “Don’t worry you’ll meet someone else”.

There is a degree of clear-sightedness about those who see the hopelessness of life. Life is uncertain. We will die. Things are bad. How do we know that “you’ll meet someone else”? Is it such a good idea to have our minds lifted off things – if the things are serious and need to be thought through?

On Sunday mornings we’ve been looking at St. Paul’s letter to a group of new Christians at Ephesus. In it he describes what they were like before they came to know Jesus. He says “Remember that at that time you were without hope” (Ephesians 2:11).

In an uncertain world hope can only be found in that which does not change, and which can change us. In other words hope can only ultimately be found in Jesus. He doesn’t change, but he changes us. How can I tell someone whose relationship has just fallen apart that they will find someone else? I can’t, but I can tell them about someone who will love them, and who will be there for them, and who will never leave them. That’s Jesus. How can I tell someone that things will get better? I don’t know their future. But I can tell them about Jesus, who guarantees a home, and a welcome, and a future to all who come to him. Jesus is the one who will give strength to cope.

The hope that Jesus gives isn’t vague or insubstantial, it is utterly certain. It has been purchased by him with his life. Paul goes on to describe elements of this hope – we are heirs, we are family members, we are citizens of God’s kingdom. All of these are about belonging, and having a secure future. That’s what Jesus offers – acceptance, belonging and a hope that no one can take away. Peter picks up this theme too:

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade – kept in Heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God's power.” (1 Peter 1:3-5)

If you would like to find out more about this hope, please contact me or come along to one of our services.

Mark Loughridge is the minister of Milford Reformed Presbyterian Church and Letterkenny New Life Fellowship. You can read more by him at http://three17.blogspot.com.

Book Review - The Da Vinci Code – From Dan Brown’s Fiction to Mary Magdalene’s Faith

The Da Vinci Code – From Dan Brown’s Fiction to Mary Magdalene’s Faith
Garry Williams
Christian Focus
£1.99

If you’re looking for a crisp concise book to give away setting out the facts about the Da Vinci Code and the Bible, then this is it. Garry Williams and Christian Focus have done us all a service in producing this. Williams deals with seven major claims that the book (and after May 19th, the film) makes about Jesus, the New Testament and Mary Magdalene, all in the first chapter. Having reduced the Da Vinci Code to mush, he then looks to see if the New Testament can stand the same sort of rigorous treatment. He finishes up by asking what lessons does Mary Magdalene really teach us.

One of the things that comes across in virtually every book about the Da Vinci Code is the basic schoolboy errors that Dan Brown has committed. Williams quotes with relish one review from the Sunday Telegraph, “Brown’s book is not garbage. It’s garbage on stilts, it’s hyper-garbage…”.

Williams is smart, he knows his stuff, and communicates it clearly. If you only have half an hour to get your head around the basics - then this is it. If you are looking for something in depth, this isn’t it – try Stephen Clark’s book The Da Vinci Code on Trial, or Darrell Bock’s Breaking the Da Vinci Code. But if you are looking for something brief to give away this is the job.

Another Voice - April's Verse

(Letterkenny Post newspaper column. Once a month the article covers a verse on a calender we gave out inLetterkenny with the Baptist church)

It was the day after Christmas day 1944, in the small Italian village of Sommocolonia. Lieutenant John Fox of the US army was stationed in a tower in the village and was acting as an artillery spotter for the big guns in the Valley. Shortly after 4am he was awoken by the sound of gunfire.

As dawn broke over the mountains, the 29-year-old lieutenant saw that the streets below him were swarming with German troops. They were determined to take the village en route to taking a strategic port to the south to cut off supplies to Allied forces.

By mid morning the fighting was brutal with the villagers joining with the small group of 70 G.I.s stationed in the village. The men in Sommocolonia fought on until more than two-thirds of them were dead or wounded, seeking to slow down the German advance.

From his observation post Fox had been calling in artillery fire on the German troops. But now the tower was surrounded by the enemy troops.

He made one last call to his friend Otis Zachary, the gunnery sergeant. “Put everything you’ve got on me.”

Zachary protested, “I can’t do that.” “Fire it” came Fox’s response.

High explosive shells rained down on the observation post, and when the dust cleared Fox lay dead, surrounded by bodies of more than 100 enemy troops.

Three days later, the German offensive sputtered to a halt. Fox had given his life so that others could live.

“This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us” – 1 John 3:16

“Put everything you’ve got on me.” They could have been the last words of Jesus. From his observation point in Heaven, he sees the punishment that is stacking up against us for our sins. He knows that those sins have to be paid for, that punishment has to be poured out, and so he looks his Father straight in the eye and says “Put everything you’ve got on me.”

On the cross he took the punishment that would have been poured on his people for all eternity, the anger of a holy God, poured out on thousands upon thousands of sins.

The message of Christianity is that if you want to know what love is, put your trust in the one who offers to take your punishment.